So.
I got a giant mole removed from my thigh yesterday. It was a super short, totally non-traumatic procedure. My doctor, this beautiful blonde from South Africa, when she found out I was from California, actually stopped excising and said, deadpan:
"Why on EARTH would you live here if you could live in California?"
I got a few stitches, got bandaged up, and came home. No biggie, right?
WRONG. Enter The World.
In case were wondering, here is the super official, totally legit definition of The World, according to authorities:
The World: A douchebag entity that send problems, illnesses, inconveniences, traffic, paperwork, car repairs, and other negative experiences when you can least handle it.
So. Today? I was going to take it easy. Do some paperwork. Schedule some stuff.
BUT NO.
Today, of all days, there were 2 seperate water leaks in the same building. There were notices to post. There were door handles that broke off, with people stuck inside their apartment. There were clogged sinks, and smudgy windows, and spilled slurpees.
There were tenants doing unauthorized moves, commandeering the elevator, forcing little old me to take the stairs. With brand new, burning, stinging stitches in my thigh.
There were Canadian banks refusing to serve me over the phone, because I'm "multicultural" (as my ignorant Canadian phone representative informed me) and have to visit a branch to get anything done.
There was a staging company sitting outside my house, waiting for credit card authorization, to go in and set up. While I was trying to get this bank to help me.
Now, it's 4:36 PM. I'm in my pajamas. And I'm NOT GETTING UP AGAIN, except for food and toilet. Because my tiny, no-big-deal, itty bitty little wound? It's bleeding again.
So, I send out this message to that douchebag entity: The World. SCREW YOU TOO.
Sincerely,
Leah
No comments:
Post a Comment