It's amazing how I'm still growing as a person, and I'm double that age now. Does the changing and struggling and fixing things about yourself ever really go away? Or is that just a delusion of youth?
So, because I like lists, I'm going to list a few things I should've learned a long time ago, but didn't.
1) Mayonnaise is delicious. I've been hating on it for years, but that's only because I've been eating gross sweet mayo. Homemade mayo is manna from heaven.
2) Hurrying through my meals is a bad habit. I should be able to sit and enjoy food, since I'm eating it anyways. I used to see my speed-eating as a positive - like I could put it on my resume or something. It's not. It makes me eat too much and gives me stomach problems.
3) Canada is not just a crappy version of the U.S.. My first comment to Norman when we landed in Hamilton, ON, was "Canadians look like Americans, except they're happy."
4) I'm a feminist. I've been avoiding that word for years, because it is so loaded - especially in a conservative, religious atmosphere. But the truth is, I'm a feminist. I believe in gender equality. And no, that does not mean I love power suits or want to be a man in any way. I just want the access to the opportunities and blessings to be the same no matter your chromosomal makeup.
5) Happiness is not complicated. I used to think that I had happiness figured out - that it is something achieved after years of struggle with self, with God, with others. That it was a balance. Turns out happiness is what happens when you accept who you are and what you are capable of. It happens when you start living every day as a new opportunity for good, as opposed to a punishment for past mistakes.
6) I never want to be part of a society that teaches women that they need to wear shapewear every day. It is indicative of restraint in so many other ways. I can honestly say that, at least for me, the shapewear I sported on a daily basis was the outward manifestation of something very, very wrong in how I perceived myself.
7) Not everything I think is bad is universally accepted as such. Not to say I change my view of whether or not it is bad, but rather that people who don't have the exact same view of what is "good" and "bad" as me are not, therefore, "bad" people.
8) There are bad people out there. Very. Bad. People.
9) I've let people manipulate me far too much in the past. I discovered that there are very, very few people whose opinions matter to me. The rest of you can feel free to shove your negative feedback where the sun don't shine.
10) My faith journey is mine, and mine alone. Maybe someday I'll start sharing it on here. But I don't need to validate my testimony or personal convictions to ANYONE, EVER.*
11) I really like me. I think I'm great. And I think that leaving the abyss known as Provo, Utah was the BEST thing I have ever done. For myself and for everyone there.
So what are some of the things you know now that you should've known when you were 13?
*Except in a temple recommend interview. Then, you know, it's kind of, like, mandatory.
